Craft Magazine just tweeted about hosting pie throwing parties, which reminded me of my dream last night. I dreamt I was going to throw a pie in someone's face, but not just any pie. I had a table full of different pies and I meticulously poured over each one making sure I chose exactly the right pie as the person waited patiently for me to prepare to pie him. I don't even remember who the person was.
I wonder how Freudian this might be?
When you think about it, we associate pie in face as a joke, a lighthearted act of backwards camaraderie. However, if you considered the actual ramifications of being the pie-er or the pie-ee, either way, it could be construed as rather passive aggressive. You know how some psycho-professionals (not the kind that go postal, the kind that help the postal) say that expressing your anger is important, sometimes they even say having anger at all is important to your health? I agree. When we do not get angry, we do not protect ourselves. I have lived this phenomenon for years. In reality I was angry, but had trained myself for so long not to feel it that I would blatantly allow downright hurtful actions to be hurled at me. When I finally figured out how to be angry without losing control, I began to understand the need to protect myself. What surprises me to this day is how long that road has been. At least 8 years, and I'm still working on it.
Back to the pie throwing and the healthy anger association. I was thinking how insidious passive aggressive anger is. I had flashed a thought wondering if passive aggressive could be healthy in any way, but analyzing it brings no discernible argument in its favor. Passive aggressive is meant to be hurtful, I believe. It is a sneaky way of jabbing at someone or something. We all do it, on some level. Too bad we don't have some phenomenon for being passive cheerful. Then again, outright cheerful would be preferable anyways.