Wednesday, November 02, 2011

Can I Lead the Argonauts?

I've been thinking about passion.  Successful people tend to be passionate about what they are doing.  You can hear it in their voice.  It doesn't have to be some lofty thing, or astounding.  Some people are so passionate about quilting that they make a great living out of it.  Some people are so passionate about programming that they invent new things.  Not only are these people successful, they love their jobs, they have fun.

Heroes are people with passion.  They believe with every fiber of their being.  Imagine Jason pursuing the golden fleece, sauntering through the countryside, whistling as he goes, tossing rocks and stopping in at every pub.  Not exactly the picture of drive.

I've been wondering if I am passionate enough.  I love writing.  I can't imagine doing anything else.  But am I actually passionate about it?  Life has interfered so often in this last year that I wonder if I am allowing it to.  I have begun to feel that living in a place where nuance of conversation is lost so that I have essentially one friend and three family members in my immediate surroundings to talk to, my own family in the wider circle, is this limiting my scope?  I wonder if my world view is becoming bent too far in the direction of the people I am able to talk to.

Is passion something like love at first sight?  Does it hit you over the head and you think, "Bazinga!  I know what I want to do"? (thank you Sheldon for the expletive)  Or is it something you've known all your life?  Is it a combination of the two?  Some element suddenly comes together with another and inside you feel you've found what you've been looking for all this time?  Or maybe it's just the act of sloughing off self-doubt.

I can see myself adrift at sea, not really rowing as hard as I should.  My little lifeboat sort of heads in a direction.  I wish for more passion, more drive.


De said...

I'm re-marking this unread" because I need to give it some thought & figure out what I really believe. I recently had a sleepless night and made a few decisions that I thought would make me feel better, but when I talked to Tony about it, he gave me such simple (and less insane) solutions that I think I was up a creek without a paddle.

jaded said...

Maybe this isn't an issue about passion as much as is it is an issue of guilty pleasure.

Writing is extremely important to you and it is a large component of what makes Maggie, Maggie. But regardless of the priority of your writing, your family comes first, and as a result, things that are also important to your family's well- being like maybe laundry or grocery shopping. Motivation to write might be impacted by the nagging thought that by spending as much time as you would like on writing, you place other more mundane tasks ahead of it because theres a feeling that you might not be providing as well as your desire to for your family's needs because your doing an activity (writing) which though it might benefit them in the future, mostly benefits you in the present.

Lynnea said...

De, my husband often catches me up the creek. Just yesterday though, he finally got me pumped into an idea I've been balking at for quite some time now. He's convinced me to not be afraid to try things in a new way. And, that might just be what I needed to infuse my passion a bit.

Jaded, you are dead on, once again. I do waffle a lot between writing as a pursuit of fulfillment, a career and as a pleasure. Family concerns have a way of forcing themselves into the limelight and tsking at my desire to write - only because my brain allows it to happen though. Finding balance, it's all about finding balance I guess.